note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
false alarm. still invincible.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
