no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
