You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
