Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
