Please, let me fuck your mom
Fuck appropriateness.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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