She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize