I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
