Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Be still, my beating vagina.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
