That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Randomize
