You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
