I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.