Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
