Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
