i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
