guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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