Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
