so explain again why im purple
no
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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