Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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