Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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