I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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