so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
