I hate your face
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
