Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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