actually, I'm a sock model
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
