So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
