The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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