All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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