I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
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And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
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BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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