Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.

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(602): View more from Arizona

You can't motorboat a personality

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(416): View more from Ontario

is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??

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(713): View more from Texas

I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(703): View more from Virginia

drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip

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(407): View more from Florida

All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.

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(276): View more from Virginia

You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?

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(541): View more from Oregon

Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate

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