she looked like the before picture.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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