FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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