Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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