there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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