some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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