Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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