watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize