fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize