he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
