The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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