Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize