we have officially lost it.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize