roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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