I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
