it wasn't lemon gatorade
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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