Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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