dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
