just survived the first fart of the relationship.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
