Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Randomize
