Texts From Last Night

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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush

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  (859): I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush http://tfl.nu/5sx8
  Replies (33) Good night (1040) Bad night (1949)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?

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  (847): so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend? http://tfl.nu/ywt9
  Replies (53) Good night (3586) Bad night (1391)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.

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  (814): MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished. http://tfl.nu/8mqg
  Replies (36) Good night (5854) Bad night (1068)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.

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  (219): Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone. http://tfl.nu/2pnq
  Replies (6) Good night (696) Bad night (4724)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out

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  (573): i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out http://tfl.nu/mqff
  Replies (16) Good night (1986) Bad night (5974)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.

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  (925): Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit. http://tfl.nu/rw2b
  Replies (41) Good night (3955) Bad night (4534)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on

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  (610): you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on http://tfl.nu/unra
  Replies (20) Good night (6397) Bad night (1233)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter

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  (973): So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter http://tfl.nu/eba3
  Replies (36) Good night (2147) Bad night (5800)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?

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  (563): If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from? http://tfl.nu/xs7j
  Replies (7) Good night (1913) Bad night (3327)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.

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  (716): So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building. http://tfl.nu/resy
  Replies (7) Good night (3811) Bad night (1580)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music

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  (303): Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music http://tfl.nu/qvs5
  Replies (9) Good night (1022) Bad night (3223)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...

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  (817): there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution... http://tfl.nu/4s12
  Replies (13) Good night (821) Bad night (1933)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob

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  (775): Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob http://tfl.nu/1w2d
  Replies (6) Good night (724) Bad night (1359)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.

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  (404): I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things. http://tfl.nu/rlo1
  Replies (3) Good night (1142) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up

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  (910): Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up http://tfl.nu/ud32
  Replies (5) Good night (330) Bad night (662)

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