Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.